Measuring My Self Worth

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Hey Guys x

Sorry I didn't post yesterday - I got a new laptop and things were a bit hectic!

Anyway, let's get on with today's post.

Self worth.

I measure my self worth a lot - which stems from having self-esteem issues.

However, since I've been at uni, my self worth has been measured by how many men I've kissed/dated/slept with/loved - and to this day, the answer to all of these situations is 0. No kisses or anything beyond that.

And because of this, I feel like my self worth has diminished.

I haven't kissed anyone, so I'm less of a person. Writing it like this, it sounds completely stupid and it is completely stupid, and I don't know why this thought is even close to  being in my head, but it is.

And I know that I'm not the only one. These thoughts go through the minds of thousands of teenagers every day and I don't get it.

Why does our self worth depend on other people?

It's crazy. One person could have the power to raise someone's self esteem so high that they touch the clouds, but one word could make them come crashing off that cloud so fast that they feel like there's nothing left.

And it's really sad.

I'd love it if my self worth could be controlled in my head. Like, I wish I could love myself so much that other people have no bearing on how I feel about myself. I wish that someone saying something bad about me just completely rolled off my back and I didn't care about it.

And at the same time, I don't think I'll ever get to this point.

I feel like, even if I do feel more confident about myself in the future, people's comments will still be in the back of my mind - and I think this is OK.

In life, a lot of what we look for is approval. We want to do things that people like, we want to be liked, and that's OK.

I want people to like me. I want people to like the posts I write and the stuff I say and my fanfics and my book - my life is based on wanting to be liked.

And I think this is OK. Kind of.

As much as I want to love me for me, I want other people to love me for me too.

Thank you for reading!

Comment below how you feel about your self worth.

Keep Smiling - Lou xx

Comments

  1. Anonymous8 June 2016 at 16:10

    I totally understand you Lou! There is no need to be worried.I too have self esteem issues and I am so glad you brought it up! I see what you are trying to get across. It's like we look for approval and if we don't get it, our confidence gets knocked. I like to use this little saying I made myself:
    You know when you have a measuring jug and you fill it up with water? Well, when something which you don't like happens, some water gets taken away. When the jug is empty, you feel like there is no hope left. No peace. It takes a while to fill up and a lot of effort to keep up. When people knock it down, everything falls down like when you miss a step on the stairs. Sometimes you have to surrender. Hold the white flag up and say "You got me" However your strength and hope overpowers it and pulls through on the other side. :)
    Hope this kind of summarized what you were trying to get across!
    Have an awesome day!!

    Lauren x
    www.laurelella.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lou10 June 2016 at 09:07

      Thanks so much for this comment Lauren. That's an amazing way to put it and I will definitely be using that analogy from now on! xx

      Delete
  2. Unknown11 June 2016 at 20:10

    Such a lovely post. x

    ReplyDelete

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